Trouble in The Office

Tips to a Happy Office Life:
Helpful Advice from Office-mates

1. Make Alt-Tab your new best friend. Of course, always have a worksheet open that you can switch to from your IE page.

2. What gets written gets permanent. Keep notebooks handy and repeat agreements verbally to all involved. In the same vein, NEVER write emails to your offending party while angry. Don’t be surprised if you find your hate mail circulating around the Office in a matter of minutes.

3. Know how many of your leaves are tax-exempt.

4. Best to schedule meetings at 11AM. With the Management keeping a watch on costs, lunch meetings are No-No’s. Be warned that one of two things may happen. One is that you go through the agenda quickly and finish by 12NN at the latest. The other is that you continue with the meeting with the whites of your eyes glazed over.

5. Mirrors are extremely useful when placed strategically in your cubicles.

6. Store food items in plastic airtight containers. You wouldn’t want Mickey (the Office Mouse) nibbling on your afternoon snack.

7. Keep your own personal stock of toilet paper. Things can get pretty ugly on the rare occasions the CR runs out of paper. You may also consider getting your own dipper? Bar of soap? Shampoo? Change of underwear? Emergencies do happen.

8. Set goals for the day. Once you’ve finished listing all your TO DO’s, it’ll be five o’clock in no time.

9. Regularly check if the person next to your cubicle is okay. i.e. breathing.

10. Keep away from negative people as they drain your energy. Also avoid chismosas, emotionally unstable staff, SDPs, and workaholics. Know who they are.

11. It doesn’t hurt sometimes to hint (the subtlest hints work the hardest) that you’re getting an interview. If you were very good, it would set your manager in a panic and hurrying off to find you a pay raise.

12. Always update resumes, and keep them handy. You're not indispensable.

posted by Elyss @ 12:55 PM